— John Carney (@carney) September 26, 2013
Oh dear. Jonah Goldberg explains they are our enemies (except for dogs) and are up to no good at all.
@JonahNRO You think the pot bellied pigs will bail on us when the going gets tough? Me too. Never trusted them.
— AdamAnnapolis (@adamannapolis) September 26, 2013
The parrots have memorized your PIN numbers. #GreatAnimalWar
— Jonah Goldberg (@JonahNRO) September 26, 2013
Oh my gawd! The parrots are inside your house!
— Andy Lancaster (@andylancaster) September 26, 2013
And “Seinfeld” imitates life. The Twitter users who sparked Jonah Goldberg’s warning? They are not alone.
A pigeon flew into my head and now I want to cry
— Gabriella Tavani (@GabbiTavani) September 25, 2013
Was stood outside writing that last tweet and a pigeon flew to me and landed on my head. That's fucking cool
— Andy Moore (@AndyMoore1975) September 25, 2013
Cool? Or terrifying?
A pigeon just flew smack into my head while I was out walking just now, so brb ill be sawing my head off
— Cheeto Puff (@419BillE) September 24, 2013
A PIGEON LITERALLY FLEW ACROSS MY HEAD, I FELT ITS WINGS HIT MY HEAD IM CRYING
A pigeon just flew into my head
can't believe a pigeon flew into me bloody head
— meera (@MeeraDoctor) September 23, 2013
A PIGEON JUST FLEW INTO THE BACK OF MY HEAD OMFG
— rach ∞ (@rachaelhannahxo) September 22, 2013
A FUCKING PIGEON JUST FLEW ON MY HEAD!! MY HEART'S IN MY MOUTH!!
— YourLittleLemming ♡ (@UzmaR13) September 21, 2013
Heed the warnings, humanity!
Deer are just as dastardly.
and then a deer charged down the hill, right at me, behind my apartment while i was standing on the porch. the dog didn't even care.
— Jessica Gentile (@thejessness84) September 24, 2013
, this fuckin deer just charged at me and my gma.
— BluBitch (@_ThugMisses_xo) September 24, 2013
This baby deer charged me yesterday … LOL pic.twitter.com/UGSV1cFMuk
— Dan (@tacofro77) August 13, 2013
Do not let the cute Bambi face fool you.
— Kendra Jade Rossi (@kendrajaderossi) August 8, 2013
— Catie (@catiejeffers) August 7, 2013
The first casualty in the #GreatAnimalWar?
Eight. Times. Is that what happened to Sen. Grassley? No wonder he just swiftly left the scene of his deer slaying. Or was it an accident? Perhaps he is a soldier for Team Humans.